


5 times The Winter Soldier didn't blush and one time Bucky Barnes did

by MizDiablo



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: 5 Times, 5+1 Things, Blow Jobs, Body Image, Clint is not even sorry, Consensual Sex, Explicit Language, Game of Thrones References, Language, M/M, Movie Night, Multi, POV Alternating, Shameless Smut, Smut, Steve can't even, Tony Stark has bad ideas, Voyeurism, Watching, cursing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-13
Updated: 2020-01-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:22:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22238563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MizDiablo/pseuds/MizDiablo
Summary: The Winter Soldier doesn't blush. Maybe Bucky used to, long ago, but he doesn't remember anymore. There are a lot of things he doesn't remember.But he remembers Steve and that's all that matters.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers/Sam Wilson
Comments: 10
Kudos: 162





	5 times The Winter Soldier didn't blush and one time Bucky Barnes did

1  
"Fuck!" Tony exclaims as something in the gauntlet he is working on pops and sends a shower of sparks flying into the air. They are in the living room on the shared floor in the tower. For once, Tony didn’t want to work alone in the workshop, so he took the gauntlet and a few tools and went to the table. Barnes and Natasha had been talking in Russian when he came in, but after a brief smile in greeting, none of them seemed bothered by him, so he just sat down and started working. Since then Natasha has left and Barnes have started reading a newspaper – an actual newspaper, because Barnes is an old, old man.

“Um… Sorry…” Tony hastily adds, remembering how often Steve corrects him when he swears. Tony would try to do better, if it wasn’t so much fun to get Steve to make that face. Once, when Tony had accidently broken a priceless artifact in a museum after a fight and sworn a blue streak, Steve had actually turned completely red and had sputtered something about ‘language’ before sending Tony a disapproving look and leaving the room quickly. Luckily for them, the bad guys had been captured by that point and Steve wasn’t needed for the clean up.

Apparently, it’s not a thirties thing, like Tony had thought. It’s just a Steve ting, because Barnes looks up over the top of the newspaper and shrugs. "Doesn't bother me." and oh. Ooh, that is a challenge if ever Tony heard one.

“So you don’t care if I say fuck?” Tony asks slyly. Barnes shakes his head without looking up. Then the door opens and Steve comes out, giving Bucky a kiss before sitting down next to him with a cup of coffee. “What are you talking about?”

“Stark broke his thing.” Bucky says, eyes still firmly in the newspaper. Steve looks over and notices the burns on the table. “Tony! We’ve talked about this!”

There comes a lot more after that, but at some point, Tony stops listening and starts working out how to break Barnes.

He starts out slow, saying fuck a few more times just to be sure. Barnes never reacts. Then he moves on to asshole, son of a bitch, cunt and then motherfucker. Still no reaction. But Tony is nothing if not creative. So it goes from son of a motherless goat to Jesus tit-fucking Christ on a cracker and while Barnes does not react, Steve turns red more than once and Pepper starts sending him disapproving looks.

It’s clear that Pepper is in no way amused by his new idea and is getting very close to shouting at him, which is a surprisingly rare occurrence with all the shit he does. A smart man would take that as a sign to stop. Tony might be a genius, but rarely has he been a smart man.

It’s the sentence ‘cocksucking goat whore’ that does it.

“That is it, Tony! I will not let you subject everyone here to the kind of language. I expect you to apologize and every time you talk like that from now on, I will force you to participate in a board meeting that I will ensure is at least four hours long!” She says firmly, making everyone in the room shut up and stare. Tony swallows, knowing when he is beat. “I… I’m sorry Pep… I’ll stop now…”

“Good.” She nods sharply, then turns on her heal and leaves the room. Everybody stares after her unmoving for a moment.

Then Barnes slides soundlessly up next to Tony with a wry smile. “You know I was in the army a lot longer than Steve, right? You haven’t said anything I haven’t heard before…”

2  
It’s not hard to convince the other to watch Game of Thrones together, but Natasha is still proud that she succeeds in finding a day where they all have time.

Most of them have seen parts of the show already, but they agreed to start over because Bucky needs to be caught up and Tony didn’t pay attention the first time Pepper made him watch it. Still, because of that, she knows there is something for everybody. Natasha herself likes the intrigues and secrets. Clint likes the dragons, even if he has to wait for a while before they show up. Thor, after have gotten an explanation about the show and watching a few clips, enjoy the costumes, even if Bruce likes to point out the historical inaccuracies. Tony likes the naked people and Pepper likes the story. Like Bucky, Steve haven’t actually seen the show, but Natasha expects he will like the battles. And Bucky will like anything Steve likes just to see him smile.

So now, they are finally ready for the first episode, everybody gathered in the chairs and sofas in the living room. Tony and Pepper are curled together in one of the big chairs. They have made up after Tony’s sudden burst into profanities and Pepper has even changed into pajamas like the rest of them. Clint and Natasha have gathered a pile of pillows on the floor and are lounging in them while Bruce has a chair of his own. Thor is on one end of the couch and Bucky and Steve are leaning on each other in the opposite end.

Most of the episode goes by rather peacefully, at least by Avengers standards, even if Tony throws his popcorn at the screen when he gets annoyed with some of the longer speeches. The only thing that happens because of that is that Clint throws a pillow at him to make him stop, making Thor laugh and Pepper huff.

Despite their many different interests, they all seem to enjoy the episode, even if they talk as much as the characters does.

Then Bran climbs the tower, spurring Thor, Bruce and Tony into a discussion about medieval and Asgardian buildings.

Steve opens his mouth to comment, but then the camera shifts and shows what is happening inside the tower. First Steve goes red and then completely white when he sees that it is Jamie and Cersei.

“But they… They’re brother and sister.” Steve gets out after a stunned silence.

“They are.” Natasha confirms, smiling at the bewildered expression on Steve’s face.

“And they are… They’re together!?”

“They are.” Natasha pauses the show as the credits starts to roll and Tony gets up to get more popcorn for the next episode.

“They…” Steve just stares at the screen for a moment. Bucky leans over and kisses him on the cheek with a smile. “It’s just a show Steve. It’s supposed to be like that.”

Steve doesn’t say more as Tony returns with refreshments and they start the next episode. While they all enjoy the show, it never gets easier for Steve when there is a scene with sex, nudity or incest. Every time, without fail, he turns red and hides behind Bucky, who just smiles and pulls his boyfriend closer. He doesn’t seem to mind the scenes, but that might be because he gets to cuddle with Steve.

They have just finished the fifth episode when Bruce announces that he is going to bed and they agree to save the rest for later. Bucky helps Natasha put the pillows back while the others clean up after the pizza and snacks.

“You don’t seem disturbed by the amount of sex in the show.” Natasha says with a smile. Bucky pauses, getting that faraway look in his eyes he sometimes gets when trying to remember something. Then he smiles back. “I have more experience with women than Steve has… It doesn’t shock me…”

“Good thing we have you to protect Steve’s virtue then.” She teases and he bumps her shoulder with his. When they go to the kitchen afterwards, Bucks first move is to wrap around Steve and kiss him tenderly.

3  
Usually, Steve has more control over his basic urges, but then Bucky comes out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel, water still dripping from his hair and running down his very defined chest. Steve might still be a little over-excited about the fact that Bucky is here and comfortable enough to walk around almost naked and that Steve gets to kiss him and touch him as much as he wants.

He is staring. He knows that, but he can’t help himself. Bucky looks so good, especially now where he has begun filling out again after being on the run for so long. Steve is sitting on the bed. He had been reading while waiting for Bucky to get out of the shower. They had plans about going to dinner on a café Pepper recommended.

Steve had been really excited about taking Bucky out for a real dinner. Now he is very disappointed that it means Bucky will have to put on clothes.

Of course Bucky notices. He might not remember much about their lives together before the war, but he still knows how to read Steve like an open book. Bucky asks something, but Steve is too busy considering how much it would take for the towel to fall off to listen.

“Steve?” Bucky asks, loud and suddenly very close. Steve’s head snaps up to see Bucky walking closer with that murder strut he does, still in nothing more than a towel, and Steve makes a sound he doesn’t recognize, a needy whine that makes Bucky smile predatory.

“See something you like Stevie?” Bucky purrs as he kneels by the bed, running a hand over Steve’s thigh. Steve swallows and tries to adjust himself so his pants don’t feel so tight.

“Ah… I…” Steve tries, his voice little more than a breath.

“Yeah?” Bucky says, running his hand up higher on the inside on Steve’s thigh while he places a kiss on the outside. It’s firm enough that Steve can feel it through his pants.

“You...” Steve gasps, when Bucky’s fingers grace the fabric of his crotch. “I… I saw you… I like you…”

“Mmm… I like you too Stevie…” Bucky says, palming at Steve’s already hard erection through the fabric of the pants. Steve arches into the touch, letting his head fall back against the wall behind the bed. “Bucky…”

“You’re right. Let’s do something more fun.” Suddenly, Bucky grabs Steve’s knees and pulls at them, pulling him to the edge of the bed so he can sit between Steve’s legs. Bucky rises up on his knees and runs his hands under Steve’s shirt, touching the soft skin underneath.

Steve tries really hard to keep his composure, but it’s a losing battle and they both know it. More so because Bucky plays dirty and pulls Steve’s shirt up to kiss his stomach and lick gently from his navel and down. Steve can’t stop the sound he makes.

“Please Buck…” Steve moans, running a hand through the long, wet hair.

Bucky hums and moves his hands to Steve’s hips. “Up” he says, quickly opening the zipper. Steve obeys as fast as humanly possible and Bucky pulls his pants down to his ankles, letting his hard cock spring free.

“You do like me.” Bucky says with an appreciating look up at Steve, who can feel himself blush from head to toe. “Bucky…”

Bucky just smiles and licks a hot strip from the head of Steve’s cock to the base. Steve moans, letting his head fall back and tangling his fingers more in Bucky’s hair.

When Bucky close his hot mouth around Steve’s cock, Steve’s hips thrust involuntary, making Bucky place both hands on his hips, holding him down. The fact that the metal hand holds on hard enough to bruise his skin should not turn Steve on as much as it does.

Steve tries to say something, but it mostly comes out as unintelligible gibberish and he can feel Bucky’s smile, even if he never moves from his task. He looks even paler against Steve’s flushed skin and for a moment, Steve almost forgets the physical pleasure in favor of drinking in the beautiful sight of Bucky. The way he moves, his hair falling around his face, the color of his skin. For a brief second, Steve can’t breathe with how much he loves everything about Bucky.

Then Bucky does that sinfully wonderful thing he does with his tongue and Steve is back in his body with a gasp.

Bucky lets go of Steve’s hip with his right hand and slides it down Steve’s leg, until he can slide it up his own and under the towel to touch himself.

"T... Take it off... Please... I want... I want to see you…” Steve begs, breathless and hoarse. Bucky pulls his hand out and removes the towel, throwing it unceremoniously on the floor. Their positions means that Steve can’t see as much as he wants, but it’s enough and it’s so much better. It’s always better when he can see Bucky. Steve wants to watch him forever.

He doesn’t get forever. Bucky knows him too well for that. After a few more moments, Bucky speeds up, just a little and Steve is done for. He pulls on Bucky’s hair a little when he comes, the way he knows Bucky likes and gets a groan in response before Bucky follows him over the edge.

Steve lets himself fall back onto the bed with what he knows is an incredibly stupid grin on his face. A moment later Bucky crawls into the bed and snuggles up close to Steve. He is still gloriously naked.

“You’re so pretty Buck…” Steve mumbles, still working on getting his brain to work again and puts his arms around Bucky, who just huffs. Steve knows that Bucky doesn’t see himself as beautiful, that he only see the broken, ugly parts in the mirror, but Steve will never stop trying to convince him otherwise. He has an idea he wants to try and he has been gathering courage to ask. He thinks today might be good. And if that idea happens to fulfill a certain fantasy Steve has, well, that’s just his good luck.

They will soon have to hurry to get to their reservations in time, but just for now, Steve pulls Bucky closer and enjoys the quiet feeling of being with him.

4  
It is hard to understand Barnes. It is clear that he is a valiant fighter and a fiercely loyal companion, especially to the Captain, but he does not talk much. His eyes are attentive and his words are clever, but often he stays a silent shadow behind Captain Rogers.

They are a team. And teams work together. So in an effort to understand Barnes better, Thor asks him to spar in the gym. The soldier hesitates, watching the Asgardian for a moment before agreeing to go.

So that where they are now, changed and ready to fight. Thor knows Barnes is strong. Almost as strong as the Captain. It will make it easier for them to fight. He will not have to hold back as much as he does with Lady Natasha and Barton.

“Are you ready, friend Barnes?” Thor asks, looking at the soldier, who nods. He does not move to attack, but Thor does, charging forwards to tackle his opponent. Barnes sidesteps quickly, slamming the metal arm into Thor’s back with enough force to break the Asgardian’s momentum and send him into the mattress.

Thor turns, grabbing Barnes’s leg and making him fall down next to him. Soon, the two are grappling on the mat, each trying to get the upper hand and pin the other. They are closer than most people dare get to Thor, but Barnes does not seem uncomfortable. While his human arm is not strong enough to be a match for the battle, he knows how to best use it to gain an advantage over his foe. Combined with the strength of the metal arm, he makes a formidable warrior.

They have long since ended that bout and several others, when they sit together on the benches, drinking water.

“You are very skilled friend.” Thor comments, getting a grunt from the dark-haired man. Lack of answers has never been enough to deter Thor, so he continues. “I hear that you were trained with the Captain and fought with him in wars long ago.”

Barnes nods, drinking his water.

“Friend Stark claims that you have been partners as long as you have fought together, yet I hear no tales of your love before your return.” Thor says. This time, Barnes shrugs. “Wasn’t allowed.”

“I do not understand.” Thor says. Much of the Midgardian world is different than Asgard and he has learned that to understand, he must swallow his pride and ask when he does not know.

“When we were young.” Barnes says, putting the water bottle away. “It wasn’t allowed for men to be together.”

“Surely you jest friend. How could a love as strong and virtuous as yours ever be forbidden?” Thor asks, very perplexed.

Barnes shakes his head. “Steve wasn’t Cap yet and I was just a kid from Brooklyn. Homosexuality was illegal. It was seen as a disease. If any had known, they’d have tried to ‘cure’ us.” 

“Did no one know the truth?” Thor asks, eyes wide in horror of such a thing.

“Some. Steve’s mother, our friends. People we trusted.” Barnes says. He is looking far away, remembering the past.

“It saddens me that something so true was hidden. What of your carnal joining? Was it impossible to feel a lovers embrace?” Thor asks, unknowing how the question will be received. He has experienced that most Midgardians do get uncomfortable when talking about intimate acts, while some (Stark) takes great pride in sharing every detail.

“Not impossible.” Barnes starts, not seeming embarrassed in the least, yet not eager to divulge details either. “We had to be careful. Nothing in public. Nothing too loud. The bed would creak, so we had to be on the floor.”

“But you were not under suspicion from spending time together?”

“No. We lived together after Steve’s mother died. We were both poor. Easier to share the expenses. It wasn’t uncommon for two bachelors to live together back then.” Barnes says, picking up his water again.

“I am glad.” Thor says sincerely. “Never have I heard of a place where love is forbidden simply for the gender of the partners. It saddens me that you had to endure such a time. I am glad that you are now free to be together as you wish.”

“Yeah… Me too…” Barnes says and sends Thor one of his rare smiles.

5  
“But you can’t have gone the entire war without sex. That’s just not possible.” Clint says, adjusting his aim slightly and hitting the center of his target thrice in a row.

“We didn’t.” Bucky says calmly, shooting the target too, just to prove he can do anything Clint can do. It makes the archer smile. Most people think The Winter Soldier is brooding and dark all the time, but Clint knows he’s a stubborn bastard who doesn’t let anyone tell him what he can and can’t do. He is also a lot more fun than most people think.

“What’d you do? There were people around all the time, you were in a war zone…”

“Steve had a tent. Captain’n all.” Bucky shrugs. “We had experience keeping quiet. Sometimes we’d sneak away. It got very dark at night.”

“Jesus…” Clint lowers his bow for a moment. “Imagine that. Captain America, fucking his sergeant up against a three in some godforsaken German wood in the middle of the night.”

“Don’t have to imagine.” Bucky says, sending a last shot towards the targets. They’ve been testing weapons for research and development all day with more of less success. It’s one of the few things they get to do together outside of missions and Clint enjoys this time alone with Bucky. They are both competitive enough to make it fun, but not so much that they get mad at each other about it.

They give their notes to the developers, stressing the points that could become dangerous in a battle situation and go to the locker room to shower. Shooting might not seem like a workout, but especially the bow is hard to work and it’s very nice to get washed up afterwards.

“This must be your favorite part.” Clint smiles as he steps under the hot water, not bothering to hide his naked body from Bucky. The soldier never really looks much at him, Clint knows he only has eyes for Steve, but it’s still fun to tease him.

“Don’t flatter yourself.” Bucky says, the barest hint of a smile on his lips as he starts washing.

“I know you’re used to naked super soldier, but you gotta admit this is not bad.” Clint says, gesturing to himself. Bucky just sends him a look. It’s the ‘shut up you idiot’-look, a look he perfected on Steve when they were young and now use on everyone that bothers him. Clint sends him a brilliant smile back.

“Come on, if not me, then who?” Clint throws the soap at Bucky, who just catches it with the metal hand. “If not me and not Steve, who?”

“Why would I answer that?” Bucky says, carefully rubbing the soap on his left arm.

“Because it’s fun.” Clint smiles, turning off the water and grabbing the towel. “It’s a thought experiment.”

Bucky sighs loudly, looking very done with the entire conversation, but when he goes to grab his towel, he says “Sam…”

“Sam huh?” Clint dries his hair, unbothered with his face being the only part of him that the towel ends cover. “Some dark chocolate. I get it. You know they met because Steve started flirting with him?”

“Yeah, he told me.” Bucky starts dressing again. “You?”

Clint grins, overjoyed that Bucky is, even reluctantly, playing his game. “Well, I’m not as all the way gay as you guys, so I’m probably stuck with Tasha. But if I had to go for a guy, I’m thinking Stark. He has experience, you know? And there are some of the things he’s told us about I wouldn’t mind trying.”

“I hope that never happens.” Bucky says with a defeated smile. “Neither of you would ever shut up about it.”

“It would be a tale that needed to be retold many many many times.” Clint laughs before he finally picks up his clothes to cover himself up.

+  
"You look so beautiful Buck. I still can't believe you are letting me have this. God, I love you so much." Steve says, making Bucky look over at him. He is in a chair by the bed, fully dressed except for the cock he has pulled out of his pants and is stroking slowly." So gorgeous for me..."

Bucky makes a small whine he's never made before as Sam thrusts into him again.

Steve had been the one to persuade Sam. It had been easy once he’d convinced Sam that it was something they both had agreed on and wanted. Sam had been under the false impression, shared by many people, that Bucky had ever been capable of saying no to Steve. Not that he wouldn’t have said yes anyway, just to see the happy look on Steve’s face. And so far, he has no reason to regret his decision.

There are a thousand things Bucky only does because Steve asks him to and this sounded a lot more appealing than therapy twice a week (which he also does and it does help, but he doesn’t enjoy it).

After a lot of talking, mostly between Bucky and Steve, but later Steve and Sam and then all three of them, they had agreed on this. All of them.

“Are you ready?” Sam asks.

“That’s your big opening? ‘Are you ready?’ What am I, some kid you are taking to school?” Bucky asks, lifting an eyebrow. Sam hesitates and looks at Steve. He doesn’t look at Bucky. Another thing he shares with most people these days is a difficulty reading Bucky’s moods. Only Steve knows him well enough to understand, so Sam keeps an eye on Steve to make sure no one is having second thoughts. Steve nods encouragingly and motions him to go on.

It’s enough to make Sam step forwards and wrap an arm around Bucky’s waist. He hesitates for the barest moment, judging if the advance is allowed, before pulling him closer and kissing him. It’s not like kissing Steve, thank god. That would have freaked Bucky out. It’s cautious and curious, a gentle exploration and Bucky lets Sam take the lead, following where he goes. He puts his arms around Sam’s neck and lets the human hand stray into his short hair. It’s shorter than Steve’s, denser, but pleasant to touch.

Finding Bucky to be a willing participant, Sam gets braver and lets a hand wander to grab the soldier’s ass. It’s a firm, but gentle squeeze and Bucky closes his eyes, allowing himself to feel all of this. Because it’s not Steve and he usually doesn’t have eyes for anyone but Steve, but Steve is there, watching them. Steve wants this.

Turn out Captain America is a kinky fucker who wants to watch the love of his life getting fucked by another man, but since Bucky’s biggest kink was always giving Steve whatever he wants, he doesn’t mind. Sam is there to help a friend. Or maybe just for the experience. Who wouldn’t want to claim they had sex with a ghost who died in World War II?

Bucky isn’t dead. Not by a long shot. Seeing Steve watch him with lust-dark eyes is making him feel more alive than any therapy ever did. Because Steve is watching him, not Sam. Steve’s eyes move over Bucky’s body, his face, his chest, his groin, ass and legs, but never stray to the man next to him.

Steve had talked at length about this. About how beautiful Bucky was when they were together, how much he wanted to be able to see more, to just look at him forever. Bucky knows he isn’t beautiful, but like this, with Steve’s dark eyes watching him so intently, he can almost believe that what Steve sees is.

Sam had made quick work of their clothes, taking the lead that Steve usually has and leaving Bucky to just go along for the ride and enjoy. To be on display for Steve.

Sam’s touch feels good, patient and careful and gentle, but it is knowing that Steve is watching, that Steve is enjoying this as much as they were, that makes Bucky moan quietly as Sam pushes into him, moving both of them.

It’s good, even if it’s not Steve, but as long as Steve is there, Bucky can enjoy this. Sam knows what he is doing, getting the angel just right as he thrusts into Bucky, making him moan again. Sam’s arms are around him, holding him up so Steve can see, and Bucky puts his on hands on the darker skin, holding on to something as he falls apart. On the chair, Steve comes a moment later, knowing Bucky well enough to time it with him.

He is barely aware of Sam coming, because Steve moves forwards to capture Bucky’s mouth in a deep, loving kiss.

Sam pulls away, grabbing his clothes while Steve curls up to Bucky on the bed.

“I’ll give you guys some space. If you even wanna do this again, call me.” Sam smiles as he leaves. Steve waves him off with a heartfelt thank you before pulling Bucky in close.

“That was so wonderful baby… You were so beautiful for me…” Steve whispers, his shining eyes filled with awe as he looks at Bucky. Like this, post-coital and languid, Bucky can’t find any words to disagree with him. So, maybe, Steve is right. At least for now.

**

He finds the first drawing already the next day. It's him and Sam, pale skin pressed against dark, Sam's arm around his midriff and Bucky's metal hand over it. His eyes are halfway closed and moth half open in ecstasy. It's beautiful. He knows he does not look like that. No one looks like that. But it's how Steve sees him. And what Steve sees, is wonderfully, breathtakingly beautiful.

Steve loves Bucky. And Steve is everything that is good in this world. So, if Steve can love him, there must be something good left in Bucky. He must be something more than the broken, evil monster Hydra made. He must be worthy of that love.

He is still watching the drawing when Steve comes back from his run. The Avenger smiles when he walks up and kisses Bucky on the cheek. “Aw Buck, you’re so pretty whey you blush like a dame.”

**

The Winter Soldier doesn't blush. Maybe Bucky used to, long ago, but he doesn't remember anymore. There are a lot of things he doesn't remember.

But he remembers Steve and that's all that matters.

Steve, who still wants him, still loves him, broken mind and broken body.

Bucky tries to tell Steve that he isn’t the same anymore, isn’t the boy who grew up in Brooklyn with him. Steve just smiles. “In case you hadn’t noticed, I’m not exactly the same either Buck.”

So that’s how it is. Steve loves Bucky. And Bucky might not remember much, but he remembers that he loves Steve.


End file.
